Here we go, bring on the social worker...

For this adoption, I am more laid back about the social worker coming today. Last year I was kind of crazy. I cleaned closets and such because you never know if your social worker will say, "Would you mind if I took a look in your closet? I want to make sure you didn't throw all the junk you didn't have a chance to go through in there to make it appear you are cleaner than you actually are!" This year, if that were to happen, I would simply say "No, you are not allowed in closets, all my junk is in there in piles. Sorry"

So this time I am just straightening up a little. She will see some stains on the floor because I can't afford to bring in the carpet cleaning company this time. She will see a little more clutter because with a toddler, I don't have as much time to go through things during the day. Yes, I have a blog, am on a few yahoo groups and facebook but come on, we all need our down time. Must I be doing something every waking moment to futher the family?!!

This time I have a new social worker so it will be the first time she comes to our home. She was recommended by a friend and has already done an Ghana adoption so that will be helpful. Ghana adoptions are not as common so most social workers have not done one. We don't need a new homestudy but more of an update to our old one. With our state, our homestudy is still good but we need to make some adjustments to show that we adopted Selina. This is good news as we are saving some time, money and paperwork! It can't get better than that!

To read about my experience with our first social worker visit when I was slightly more neurotic go here. As I reviewed my past experience, it looked like I procrastinated a bit back then too. Good to see I am consistent in my shortcomings!

We are looking forward to getting this done and moving to the next step in the process so bring on the social worker!!

A new month... bring on February...

I am headed into a new month and am so glad to be done with January! You may be saying that January is not over but I have ended it early. I am done with it!

I have been spanked this month. I should be sleeping now but I am just relaxing and processing it all. I was so busy at work. I had several big trainings to do, a newsletter to complete and I chaired a fair that the school district I work for put on with six other districts. It is to provide information on services available for our students with disabilities as they transition out of high school and into adulthood. We had vendors from 60 different organizations there providing information to over 500 families with children with disabilities. I have worked on this fair the better part of the last three months and took on more of the work than I would have "if I had known then what I know now". Either way the fair was last night and it went very well and all my other trainings and projects are completed!

At the same time, the girls have been ill most of the month off and on. Catey was out of school for a week and poor Selina is on about her 12 illness since coming home in June. She keeps getting respiratory and/or ear infections. One right after another. We are working on it with her doctor. She is now on daily medicines and breathing treatments to help her through this winter. We are hoping it is part of it being her first winter here and that she is just catching all she is exposed to. She is a trooper and does not know she is ill most of the time which makes me feel better about her going through this. Hopefully next winter won't be as bad. I don't like having the kids on daily meds but I am really anticipating that this will help her get through this winter and catch up from all these illnesses.

I am just happy that we are through this month. Balancing work and home was difficult in January. I know other working moms can appreciate those times when you are really needed at both. Thankfully I have an awesome husband who did a lot of those things I would usually do this month.

Work will ease up for me the next few months, Selina is hopefully on the mend for good and we are meeting with our social worker and starting our homestudy next week. I am sure in the meantime, I will find a few more projects to start working on. I can't keep still long. I look forward to getting more pictures posted here as I am behind in sharing stories and pictures. So come back and visit soon as I plan to post more in February...

4

Now that we have been home over six months, we are getting asked more often if and when we will be adopting again.
As you may recall, when we started the process to adopt from Ghana, we planned to adopt a brother and sister. This was actually TR's idea as when he told me that he also wanted to adopt, he added that he wanted to adopt two children which I was thrilled about. So now that Selina is home... are we still planning on adopting again??

YES! YES! YES! Even on our worst, craziest and most chaotic days, in the middle of it all- if you ask me if I want one more- the answer is YES! TR on the other hand says to ask him when they are sleeping tonight- JK. We are now both ready to start the process again.

So, we are planning to add to our family by adopting a boy. We are thinking that he would be between Kman and Cater (5-8) although we know that sometimes our plan is not what is meant to be and so we are keeping our options open.

We know our son is in Ghana. What we do not know for sure is where he is. I really feel this time that I will have an idea of who our son is before starting the process. I think we may end up adopting a child that is waiting. For this reason, I don't know exactly how this adoption will happen. It may be from the agency we adopted Selina from (AAI), another agency or an independent adoption. I think that we will hear about our son or find him ourself and that is who we will adopt.

For this reason, I am putting out there what our plan is- maybe you know who our son is??LOL We are starting our homestudy and to work out the finances of this adoption. Like many people our financial situation is affected by the economy and so we have to adjust. We have faith that it will all work out.

It has been interesting so far as I did check into some other adoption options as there are more out there now than when we started the process with Selina. I wanted to keep an open mind. I had one contact that may have worked but then some things happened (or did not happen) to let me know that it is not meant to be. At the same time I learned that there may end up being a child through AAI who will not have a referral once he is referral ready. When we adopted Selina, their program was smaller and still in the pilot phase so there were never really any children waiting to be referred. So it looks like it just may work out to adopt through them again- time will tell...

Are we nervous about the thought of adding an older boy to our family? Definitely... We feel this will probably be harder than our adoption with Selina as she has been so incredibly easy so far. We now know that this adoption will probably be hard on Cater initially like the adoption of Selina was. We are sure that Selina will have difficulties with this too.

We do believe though that it will all work out and we will know when we find our son. I think that if anything, going through this process and bringing Selina home has only shown us how wonderful adoption can be. We did not know what to expect and truly prepared for the worst. Instead, adding Selina to our family has been far easier and more natural than we ever expected.

It is so amazing that you can give birth to two children and love them more than anything else in the world. Then you can travel to a foreign country and meet a child that is already yours on paper and just fall so in love with her- a love that is no different than the love you have for the children you gave birth to. We are so blessed.

So there you have it, we are about to embark on another year of so of hurrying, waiting, laughing, crying and praying. We are so excited (and of course a little nervous) to see what this year has in store for us because we now know that in the end, it is so worth it!!!

Update on Albert...

I have not updated on Albert as I was hoping to get a little more information and possibly a picture. With it being the holidays and the election there, I am not sure if and when I will hear more so I will share what I know...

ALBERT HAS HIS NEW ARM! I am so excited!!! I received and email right before Christmas saying that he did get it and would be staying at the center for a few days to learn how to use it.

If you are new to my blog, you can learn more about Albert here.In a nutshell, I met Albert at the free school that Selina attended when I was in Ghana. He is missing a forearm and hand due to a birth defect. The day before meeting Albert, I went to visit some of the churches my great uncle was a priest and saw a center where they create limbs for those missing one and teach them how to use them. I talk about it here. When I got home from Ghana, I worked it out so that Albert got a new arm and hand thanks to some of the generous donations I received from friends and family before leaving for Ghana.

When I met with a good friend of Father Beem, my great uncle, I asked him what Father would have thought of me adopting from Ghana. After considering it for a moment, he said that Father would have said...
All children need to know that they matter.
Albert is a child from a very poor family and is educated in a free school. My hopes for him is that he knows that he matters. He matters to me and he has come to be loved by those who have heard his story. God has a plan for Albert. I believe he put Albert in my path and told me I needed to do this. I pray that Albert knows that he is important and that there is much that he can accomplish.

The plan for Albert is that he uses this hand for about five years. At that time, he will need to be fitted with an adult sized hand. This hand will be more complicated and cost more money but will last a long time. If he uses his hand well and is a candidate for an adult artificial hand, I will be contacted as I have pledged to take care of the cost for that. So hopefully, I will be doing some kind of awesome fundraiser to help with this.

I am still hopeful that I will receive a little more information. I have to laugh as my emails from Edward updating me are one sentence. He is definitely a man of few words talking to a woman who wants to know every last detail!! I look forward to returning to Ghana in the next year and will definitely go and see Albert and how he is doing for myself... until then, thank you again for caring about him and helping to make this happen... I could not have done it without you!

Because I care enough to wrap with the very best...I wait until it is sale and then go get it!

Well, I am trying to enjoy my last night before going back to work. Truth be told, I usually am ready to go back but I am not this time. I have had a wonderful break, I have enjoyed staying up way too late and am not wanting the responsibility of work and school and all that to get in my way.... but I guess it is time.
Christmas is over. How do I know that? Well, the wrapping paper is 75% off at Hallmark now. For all my fellow bargain hunters, it is time to head to your local Hallmark store to take advantage of the good deals to be had in the Christmas section.
I started using Hallmark paper last year. I got really frustrated with a bunch of cheap crappy wrapping paper two Christmases ago and vowed that I am going Hallmark all the way. So after Christmas that year I went and got paper 40% off. Wait, next time I went in it was 75% off so I got some more. A few weeks after that, all ornaments were $3 or $1 and the paper was $1. Needless to say, I was overwhelmed with my Hallmark wrapping paper but enjoyed every minute of wrapping with high quality paper that did not tear.
This year I was ready. I went in right after Christmas to scope the paper out but did not buy until today. I drove by to check and it was 75% off so I restocked and am back in business for next Christmas! The rolls of wrapping paper are now $1.25. They will go down one more time to $1.00 but the selection will not be as good and the matching tags and tissues will definitely be gone.
I will head over once again when the ornaments go to $3 to pick up a few. I bought several ornaments last year after Christmas in the sale and enjoyed putting them on the tree this year. Unfortunately I put my Ralphie from "A Christmas Story" too low and after a few minutes with Selina, he was missing three of his four limbs. Thankfully I only paid $3 and so I learned an inexpensive lesson.
By the way, many Targets now have their Christmas items at 90% off. Last year I happened across a Target that had 90% off of Christmas that had discovered all this stuff they forgot to put out in the storeroom and so I scored tons of stuff. I am talking hand and tip towels, Glad plastic bags with snowflakes, and my personal favorite- an Armour All car washing kit that was originally $25 that I got for $2,50! TR had to sit there with me for a few hours while I kept waiting for them to bring out the next load, and I had to be peacefully assertive with the other crazy women huddled around but it was worth it. TR (who is trained to handle assertive and agressive people) was scared of these women but not I! So no,I did not hit the Target Christmas Motherload this year, but that is alright- lightning rarely strikes twice in the same spot (or so I heard).
So my Christmas stuff is put away (except for the new wrapping papers and gift bags), wash is done and ready for the week and I have my wrapping goods for next Christmas. I guess it is time to turn off the lights and go to bed as my party is over but oh, what a great party it was...

Mmm Pizza!

Chalene and I both have a few weeks off with the kids and so we got the kids together for a trip to Peter Piper Pizza.
I love to see Selina interact with Rita and Racheal. The twins just love her and are so good to her. They cared for her and helped her so much in the adoption center. They tried to help keep her happy so she wouldn't cry. It is fun to watch their relationship change. At first they almost wanted to take over caring for her from me, probably because they thought that was their job.

As time has gone by, now they interact with her and give her attention and then run off to be kids with their siblings and Kman and Cater.


Selina just loves pizza. She starts repeating "pizza, pizza" over and over again when she sees it and has been known to polish off more pizza than Kman! I love the way she even has her dimple on as she puts the cheese on her slice!LOL

It is times like this that remind me how fortunate I am to have Chalene in my life. She has been such a wonderful support and friend and we have so much fun together. Having Rita and Racheal in Selina's life just makes me tear up when I think of how much joy it brings her. She just lights up when she sees them. I can only imagine the comfort she must feel to see their familiar beautiful faces.

A few holiday highlights...

I had great intentions to post much more about our holidays and how we spent them but time simply got away from me. I did want to share a few highlights. It was so fun for our family to have our first Christmas with Selina and to watch her experience the holidays for the first time...

Polar Express: We traveled up north to Williams, Arizona for the Polar Express. They have wonderful train ride to the "North Pole". On the way there, the family enjoys hot cocoa and cookies while the book the Polar Express is read over the loudspeaker. When we arrive at the North Pole which is an area in the middle of nowhere that is beautifully decorated with lights and villages facades, Santa enters the train and passes out bells to the children as we head back singing Christmas Carols. It is a big event as you have to book a year in advance as it is so popular. The kids loved it and Selina did great. I was afraid it could be overwhelming or that she would be afraid of Santa but she got right into it and gladly accepted her bell from him. We went with friends and stayed overnight at the hotel right there which made it all the more special and exciting!




Santa's Lap: I was encouraged thinking that now that Selina had met Santa that she would go visit him for the ever popular pic on his lap. That was not to be as she did not want to go closer that about three feet from him. We tried for a minute but she could not be talked into it. The elves asked if we should just put her on his lap and let her scream to get the picture but I said no. I think they were bummed that this meant no picture package sale for me and Santa wasn't as friendly when he learned we wouldn't be taking a picture. I thought he should be relieved that I didn't allow my child to sit on my lap and attack him as he probably could not tell that she is stronger than him! She was willing to give him a high five so I actually considered that a success as WE all left happy with no unnecessary trauma to Selina or me!


Christmas Caroling: Our neighbors started a tradition where we all go caroling. They start at one house and people join along the way. The kids have such a great time and the neighbors, especially those without children, really enjoy it!




Christmas: We all attended church on Christmas Eve. I have to share a few pictures of the outfit I got for Selina's first Christmas as I loved it so much!



Ugg, I tried to get a great picture of the family and one of just the kids but the universe was not in the right allignment and I couldn't get it accomplished. (Thankfully I have some professional pictures that I mentioned here to fall back on!)
That evening we had our family over for dinner. On Christmas morning our families came back for breakfast and to watch the kids open presents. Both my parents and TR's parents don't have any other grandchildren here (TR's sister and her family are on the east coast) so the kids receive lots of attention from their grandparents. Selina did not understand opening presents at first but like all children, she caught on quickly. It was especially fun to see the kids give each other gifts. They were excited to shop for each other and enjoyed exchanging gifts even through Cater told Kman what she got him right when she returned home from buying it!

It was another wonderful Christmas that was even more special as we had another daughter to share it with. I hope that your Christmas and New Years were also Merry. For those of my friends that were not able to spend the holidays with their newly adopted children, I had you in my thoughts and can't wait for your families to be united...