A beautiful Easter day...

We had a wonderful Easter. Mass was at the property where our church will be built in the next few years. I couldn't resist this pic of the girls walking together. Now the pic would have been better in a field of flowers or with a beautiful church and cross in the background but we have dirt and what looks like crime scene tape!LOL Cater insisted on carrying my broken umbrella to help her with the sun. Dear Goodness that girl!

After that we went to my aunt's home for a family get together. Kman has been carrying his sister on his back more since seeing Akwasi and Rita and Racheal carry her when they get together. I told him his new brother may want to carry her too so I think he wants to be a pro at carrying Selina by then. He has only almost dropped her once!


So ladies, I finally did it! We got yarn braids done just in time for Easter. Many of you know that Selina does not like getting her hair done. She seems like she is pretty sensitive to having her hair combed and pulled on no matter how gentle I am. We have gone to hair parties, done hair at all different times and tried many different things. Well, on Friday, she let me do about five braids. I was in shock! So in short, I was up that night and Saturday night until 3 am getting as many braids done as she slept! We did about four hours during the day too for a total of about 12 hours. Considering every thing, I am pleased with my first attempt!


My cousin Leah did an Easter Egg Hunt for the kids that they thoroughly enjoyed. I had to laugh as I later watched Kman and Cater doing some egg trading. I remember doing the same thing with my sister with Easter and Halloween candy years ago. Funny how years can pass and times can change but trading holiday candy is still cool!



So in short, we enjoyed a day of happiness and good health! After Selina's hospital visit and being able to take her to the hospital and get her help, I appreciate that it is truly a blessing to live in a country where we can get medical help for our children. I am so thankful for that this Easter. I hope yours was blessed too...

Dossier, Welcome Bag- CHECK!!

Last week I was busy getting our dossier and welcome bag ready to go to Ghana. I mailed it off to a family traveling to Ghana this week so they can take it over for us!

THE DOSSIER
Our dossier is a package of information that we prepare for Ghana to look at when considering our application to adopt Kwame. Among the contents is our homestudy, birth certificates, medical information and our official application from the government in Ghana, etc. It is not difficult to put together but is so nice to have completed! This information will be combined with information on Kwame and is presented in court in Ghana. Hopefully we will go to court and be declared his parents in the next two months.


THE WELCOME BAG


I had so much fun putting together Kwame's welcome bag. A welcome bag is a gallon size bag that we fill with items for Kwame to let him know that we will be his family and to tell him about us. It is done by all families in our agency for the child(ren) they are adopting. It typically includes a shirt, photo album, stuffed animal and another small trinket or two. Kwame knows his welcome bag is coming and is very excited to receive it.

When I put together Selina's bag last year, I took a long time choosing the items I put in it and thinking it through. I was so glad I did.

When I took custody of Selina in June and we left Ghana, I guess I pictured that she would have something to bring with her that was hers. In the first pictures of her I saw that she was wearing some dangling earrings. I hoped that they were from her mother and that I could have them and hang on to them for her but like the clothes she arrived at the adoption center in, they did not belong to her. The reality was that after almost two years, we walked out that day with the few items I had sent her in that welcome bag and a toothbrush.

So for Kwame, I wanted to do something special knowing it might be all he has that is his. I knew his favorite color was red so I incorporated that into the bag.

The shirt... Like with Selina, I wanted a personalized shirt. In nine out of ten pictures I see of Kwame, he is smiling and waving at the camera with his mouth shut. It is so cute and always makes me smile. I heard from a traveling parent that the staff tells him not to do that in his pictures but he does anyway. It is obviously what he feels comfortable doing. So, in honor of that, I took a picture of the kids waving at the camera and smiling with their mouths closed. I put a picture of him along with the kid's pics on a shirt bearing our last name and the number 4 since there will be four "D" kids. I also was able to have the shirt done on an Under Armour shirt this time which will be a little cooler than cotton.

The photo album... I decided this time to digitally scrap a smaller album for him. I did 14 pages introducing each family member and our pets. I did a page showing his house and the school he will go to when he comes home. At the end, I did a few pages of him and his friends including his friends that recently left Eban House to go to America. I know he will really enjoy opening the book and seeing not only his new family but a few pictures of him with his friends. We also included a note from his brother and from us. This will be nice because if anything happens to a page in Africa, I can print another one out here so that he can have this book forever. Here are two of the pages...




The hat... I decided to include a baseball cap in his bag. He loves soccer and our last name happens to be the name of a college somewhere back east so I ordered a hat bearing our last name with a soccer ball on it from the college bookstore. How perfect is that?!! On top of that, I got Kman the same hat and he is wearing the hat in the picture on Kwame's shirt! I thought Kwame would enjoy having a hat that he can look down on his shirt and see his brother wearing too!

So I was able to barely fit those things and a few trinkets in the gallon sized bag but I did (never mind the bag can't be closed)!! I also included a few hot wheels since he said he likes race cars.

I am so excited for him to get his bag this week. It is currently in route to Ghana as I type this!!

All in all, it is nice to be done with the dossier and to be that much closer to going to court! Now I am able to just relax(yea, right) and focus on getting things ready at home for Kwame!

The other night I had a dream....

Now I am not one to have dreams or remember them well. I don't have dreams that seem to mean much. But I had this dream.

I don't remember how the dream began but it ended up with me driving my minivan into a lake in order to take a shortcut to where I was going (dreams don't always make perfect sense?!). I drove into the lake thinking I could easily get across but once I got in, I realized the water was choppy and deeper than I expected. I immediately tried to turn around but I had lost control of the van and was just floating in the water. I immediately started trying to open the van door but the pressure of the water was too great and my van was starting to sink. I looked around in the van, with this sense that I could not breathe. I looked back at the land where I drove into the lake wishing I could go back and make different choices so I did not end up in this predicament. Then it was silent for a moment, that moment when you decide if you are going to give in, pray and relax or if you are going to fight to live...

At that moment I woke up to Selina (who was in bed next to me) yelling out. I immediately forgot about the dream and started tending to her. She was trying to breathe but was gasping for air and struggling. She has been having trouble breathing at night since the first night I took custody of her. I have had her into the pediatrician numerous times. She has had about nine or ten upper respiratory infections since coming home and it was always thought that the difficulty breathing at night was due to these infections and if we cleared them up she would sleep better. She was on five medicines a day but nothing was helping her at night. I had taken her into the doctor a few days earlier and was finally referred to an ENT doctor and had an appointment in the next week.

Looking at her struggling though, I knew this was not normal and I was done. I got on the phone with the ENT office but they would not talk to me because they had not seen us yet. It was a weekend night and I knew the only way to get her help immediately was to take her to the ER so off the two of us went.

On the drive as the streets were quiet and we were alone, the dream suddenly came back to me and I cried. I cried because I could imagine how Selina feels as she sleeps. I decided the dream was more about her and not about me. I had to decide if I was going to go to the hospital and leave if they tried to send me home or if I was going to stay and fight for Selina to get the help that I was sure she needed.

I promised Selina that she would get help and I was not going to get yet another medicine. I would not give up until she had relief and could sleep better. It was good that I decided this as the next 24 hours would not be easy. I took video of her sleeping and gasping for air though and I knew that would help our cause because if she was awake when the doctor saw her, he would notice nothing- she is fine when she is awake.

So in the ER I sat for 4 hours and she fell asleep for the last two of them and was still sleeping when we were called back. They checked her and realized that her saturation levels which should be between 90 and 100 were going slightly lower (in the upper 80's). The ER doc decided to have her suctioned and try some nose drops... I thought, "here we go, another nasal remedy"

So they did the suction and gave her the nose drops. Selina hated being suctioned and she woke during the procedure and was now up for the day as it was 8am. They had us wait an hour in the waiting room again to see if the nose drops would work a miracle. When a nurse came to check on us, Selina was walking around talking and being the busy two year old she was. Here is our conversation...
Nurse: Oh, she looks really good, those nose drops must have worked. We will send you home with some.
Me: ARE YOU KIDDING ME? She is fine all day, the problem is when she sleeps at night.
Nurse: Has she slept in the last hour since getting the nose drops?
Me: No, we have been here seven hours now and it is morning. Plus the suctioning pretty much woke her up for the foreseeable future.
Nurse: Well, ENT doctors don't come to the ER so we can't do much more. You'll have to go home and schedule an appointment with one. (Note it is Sunday so this means another night of horrible sleeping and me begging an ENT to see me immediately on Monday which I knew would not happen)
Me: So are you telling me that after the doctor seeing a video of my two year old gasping for air while she sleeps, he is going to send me home with a fourth nasal drop?
Nurse: Um, well, I will check with the doctor and get back to you.

Forty-five minutes later we were informed that Selina would be admitted and would see an ENT later that day. (Prior to going to this hospital, I verified that this is where the ENT group I wanted to see worked out of and knew that a doctor that was recommended was on call.)

We were finally getting help...

So Selina who is fine all day proceeded to be herself that day and her nurse commented that "She is my healthiest patient" I knew he was wondering why we were there.

The ENT showed up later that day and it was apparent that he also was unsure about how Selina ended up being admitted as this is not how it is usually done. Most people coming in for "sleep apnea" symptoms go through their pediatricians, get ENT appointments and don't end up going into an emergency room one day because they decided that enough was enough. He glanced at her tonsils though, ordered an x-ray to see her adenoids and said we would talk the next morning. I knew he was annoyed I did not follow the usual procedures. So be it.

So then comes the night... Selina fell asleep and her oxygen saturation levels were being monitored. The first two hours she stayed in the nineties but about 2am, she started dropping into the 80's and then 70's (she would always go back up to the nineties after a few seconds). She was rolling around, trying to find a position to breathe better. I watched her with tears in my eyes knowing that if she was to get help, I had to let her do this and not elevate her head or help her find a better position to sleep in like I did at home- they had to see her struggle.

Selina's new night nurse was becoming more and more concerned. I told her that I had been getting the run around having to try all these meds for nine months and that I almost got sent home by the ER doctor and that the ENT acted like I was crazy. She said, "I will document this well, no child should be breathing like this. She needs oxygen"

Selina would not wear the oxygen mask. There was no getting it on her so I spent the next six hours laying next to her following her head with the oxygen as she moved around trying to find a position to sleep in in which she could get oxygen.

The next morning, things changed. Suddenly everyone I came into contact with was much nicer as they realized that we should be there and that I was not an overreacting mom. The ENT showed up and immediately announced that her adenoids and tonsils were enlarged and they would be removed that day (that was interesting as the day before he acted like he did not know if he would be the one operating or if he would send Selina home and schedule the operation for a week or two out).

As it turned out, Selina's wait was not long at all as six hours later she was in surgery.
Here she is right before being taken in the operating room.


After surgery the doctor told me that the blockage caused by Selina's tonsils and adenoids was pretty severe and had caused her body to hold much more carbon dioxide than normal. She would have to be in ICU that night and we were to expect it to be a hard night as kids are usually not better the first night. Her condition was further complicated by her age and the fact that they had to watch how much oxygen they gave her if she needed it because of her carbon dioxide levels. It did end up being a long night. She needed oxygen all night as her levels dipped down into the 60's without it. She was pretty sore from the surgery and so when she was awake, she was not happy. She did end up sleeping pretty hard- or was that me that slept hard after only 3 hours of sleep in the previous two days? Thankfully Selina did not move around as much and the ICU nurse was able to help move her oxygen mask when need be.

The next day the ENT said he was keeping her one more night to see if she would improve. He fully anticipated that she would and thankfully he was right. That second night after surgery, she slept beautifully with no oxygen. Her levels were between 98 and 100 all night long. She slept so quietly and peacefully. I was so relieved.

And so they let us come home first thing the next morning. Selina had a great day and is doing great with eating. I know she wants some of the foods she can't have yet but ice cream and popsicles are helping her through...


Last night, Selina slept peacefully and was so quiet that for the first time ever.

...So in that dream, given the option of fighting or giving up for me it was easy, I would always choose to fight. Today I am praising God for showing me how my daughter was struggling and for the ability to have been able to help her.

Message from our son...

A mom that is in Ghana now bringing home her children has been able to spend some time with Kwame. Today she showed him the blog post below and then typed his response. This is what he said....

This is from your son:
I want to see my mom and dad. I want my mom and dad to come here. I am happy that Akwasi is there. I like my brother and my sisters. I like my family and I want to see them soon. I want to see grandpa and grandma. I want to see my dog. I like cats too. I like race cars and small model cars and I like bicycles. I want to play football with my brother.

How sweet! I can't tell you how much things like this help the wait go just a bit faster... I wonder how many times I will read these words before he comes home... hundreds of times I am sure! Guess what little man will be getting a hotwheel included in his welcome bag?!! Kman is so excited to hear that a soccer game has been requested by his new brother! Thank you Grace!:-)

To our son...

because we anticipate that a special little boy in Ghana will get to see this...

To our son,
We hope you are fine today. We are so happy that you will come to America to be in our family. We put a lot of pictures here so you can see your mommy, your daddy, your brother and sisters. Your new sister also lived at Eban House. I thought you would like to see pictures of her when she was there.
We will be sending you your album with the next mommy that goes there so you can see more pictures.
We can't wait to come and see you. I know that we have not met you yet but God has put you in our hearts and we already love you,

Love,
Your new family in America

Here I am with your brother


This is the room you will share with your brother...

Your brother likes to play soccer. Do you like soccer?
This picture is neat because your brother is running to get the ball and your dad is in the chair with the hat on watching him.



Here are some pictures of when I went to Ghana to bring home your sister.





I had a fun time with the aunties one day making their toes beautiful



Here are some pictures of your brother and sisters









Your sisters had fun playing in the water one day.




Here is Akwesi with your sister in Ghana

Here they are last week in America together.


We will be so happy when our sweet boy is here in America too!!

Sports, sports and more sports

Sports are a huge part of our house. You pretty much know when your husband announces when you are dating that there are only a few constants in his life and Penn State Football is one of them that you would be watching a lot of football.
It is not all only football though, TR and Kman really enjoy watching all kinds of sports together and going to games whether it be baseball, hockey or football. I wanted to share some pics from some recent sporting events...

Over the years he has been fortunate to be able to fly back to Pennsylvania to attend a few Penn State games. This past fall he was able to take Kman back to Pennsylvania for a game with grandma and grandpa.
They visited museums and relatives before attending the big game.








When TR went to Pennsylvania, he explained that it might be his last game for a very long time. I think it is important for TR and Kman to do things like this and they have such a great time that I encouraged them to take the trip.

So three months later, Penn State makes it to the Rose Bowl. So here he is at the Rose Bowl watching Penn State!! This time he took Cater as he thought she would enjoy the Rose Bowl Parade. They even made it to Universal Studios for a day which was a great time!





We have been blessed that TR has been able to take the kids to see these games. I know they will never forget these trips they were able to take with TR. I look forward to the day when Kwame and Selina are enjoying sporting trips with dad.

We also have enjoyed sports closer to home...For Christmas one of Kman's gifts was tickets to see a Coyote game. We got the tickets at an auction for the 3 Day Walk for Breast Cancer that we attended. The seats were awesome and Kman even got a few signed hockey pucks to go along with it. He had not attended many hockey games in the past but he absolutely loved it so I can see him wanting to attend more games in the future!!





Here are Kman and Cater at a local Diamondback Fan Day that they attended a few weeks ago.